Dancing with the Stars

Joey- For the love of god shave the beard!! There are few things that I hate more than groomed facial hair- so nasty! Oh breaking out some Erasure- nice! Well this I can appreciate this! Is it wrong that I truly appreciate a man who can shimmy!? Since it took me so long to learn how to do it (hours in front of the mirror people!). I don't really understand the gloes but whatever- overall I liked that! JC!! JC!! I HEART JC!! He was my favorite from NSYNC!

Heather- why is this nasty ass bitch still on this show!? And why is her daughter in school- she is 3!! She just grosses me out! I love how at the end of every single interview she makes some sort of excuse- what do you mean she is trying to get sympathy votes!? Oh god a remix of Don't Cry for me Argentina?! Andrew Lloyd Webber you allowed this?! God this girl can't dress- the shirt looks horrid with her nasty saggy boobs....can you tell that I hate her?!? Time to get rid of her!!

John- Go Cliff Claven! Keep him on! He is so happy and excited to be there! I mean look how happy he is out there dancing- it's all about having fun. NORM!! It's Cliff and Norm!! Oh my god that is amazing!!!! Keep him in for that- I mean if Sam and Woody come too I'll pass out!

Laila- I really like her- she has a lot of rhythm and confidence. Floats like a butterfly! By far the best girl- although there isn't much competition! But could her partner possibly do up his shirt!? I'm wondering when she'll break out the big guns and bring her father to the audience.

Billy Ray- Oh god is he still here? Ok I'm less worried about Cliff leaving...this guy is nasty and horrid....although I'd still rather Heather go home! Ok this was just simple and cheesy- it's almost like they are throwing in the towel and don't want to be there anymore. What a horrible outfit...

Apolo- can we say overrated boys and girls?! The chin hair and headbands just make me puke in my mouth! Yawn. This isn't exciting to me at all- I mean he can gyrate his hips and al but since he grosses me out so much I'm really getting nothing out of this!

Ian- ok Cliff brought Norm, Joey brought JC- I mean he can trump them all if he can bring out some Walsh twins or Dylan and Kelly. I love me a man in black....I can pretend it's not in high waisted pants! Unfortunately he is much stiffer than the other young guys- but he is trying so hard. Plus he's the hottest- therefore he should win! I mean people really- isn't life all about looks and the pretty things!?! Andrea?! He brought out Andrea?!

Group Dance- Laila is so charismatic- I'd like to see her win! Oh look at Cliff go- he is so cute! Hehe- Laila doing the lift is too funny! Yet again- Ian is too serious! Where the hell is Heather Mills?! Oh there she is- they haven't shown them at all- get rid of them! Well that lift with her just looked horribly awkward! Go Joey- that was an actual swing lift!