Twilight- the movie

It is no secret that I hated the books. I read them with the hope that they would get better- I kept reading hoping that it would give me some satisfaction in the end. It didn't. The concept of the books is great- that's what lured me in. Love me the teen vampire love. But the execution was piss piss poor!!

Well I have now received the satisfaction I was waiting for- Twilight the Movie!! I give it two BIG thumbs up!! HIGHLY RECOMMENDED. By far the laugh out loud comedy of the year! Seriously- I laughed, I cried. It was so bloody funny- and it was never ever supposed to be funny which made it better. Yes I'm lucky to have made it out of the theater alive since there were some Twilight lunatics who were probably offended I was laughing so hard and couldn't keep quiet- it was inate!! It's not my fault that people can't see that it is complete useless drivel.

The movie actually followed the books pretty much to a t- unlike my shopaholic which has been BUTCHERED! Tangent- I saw the preview tonight and they have Gia from Veronica Mars playing Suze. Suze- the blonde upper crust british roommate has been replaced by a skinny black haired American. Urg

Ok back to Twilight. Robert Pattinson was a sexy beast as Cedric Diggory. And yes there are moments when he looks normal and relaxed and incredibly hot. But for the most part he looks awkward and stiff and uncomfortable. It is truly painful to watch. He reminds me of the big guy from Legally blond who won't make eye contact and is awkward all the time. That is what he looks like. And the hair- they hair truly offends me. There were 2 scenes in the whole movie where it was down and looked normal. The rest it was teased and sprayed within an inch of its' life into a god awful pompadour. SOOO BAD. And the makeup- the amount of foundation on this guy is atrocious. But when he's just natural and rocking a suit or a grey t shirt it rocks- the guys body is amazing. But in his defense there really isn't much to do with this part- it's written poorly.

Bella is how I pictured her- boring and surly and short. I don't understand how she has relationships with others- she says nothing yet they all love her.

That is the biggest problem with the movie- if you haven't read the book you will just not get what all the hype is. Obviously you will be able to follow it since a spider monkey could but you won't get the hype. Nothing is explained or followed through on and it makes no sense that these two people fall in love so quickly. There is no interaction- the communication is atrocious. And painful to watch- which makes it so goddamn funny!

And the acting...oh the acting! It's like they spent all their money on the two leads so the rest of the cast was hired from the local strip mall. The parents were sooooo bad- hopefully they go and chillax and take some acting lessons before the next installment.

I don't want to give a lot away but I tell you it's ridiculously funny- we were all hysterically laughing. So if you are looking for a funny movie to see with your friends I do recommend this. Trust me- you'll enjoy yourself